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"Fanny"


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#1 Andrew Thorley

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Posted 13 July 2006 - 09:47 AM

Synopsis___ "An experimental short film telling the story of Fanny, a young women who suffers from severe bouts of OCD. These episodes are triggered by her domineering father, whom years previous forced her to make a life changing decision......."

i had to put this clip on the dreaded Youtube site, although it hasnt done that much of a bad job compressing the footage... any feeback would be appericated =D



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#2 Andrew Thorley

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Posted 13 July 2006 - 10:32 AM

boo embeded codes dont work on this forum

Edited by Andrew Thorley, 13 July 2006 - 10:33 AM.

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#3 LondonFilmMan

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Posted 03 August 2006 - 02:54 AM

Andrew. Yes and no. Welcome to 'the critique zone' where I'm afraid you'll have to accept it on the chin!

A pattern I have seen here in this forum is: (i) a lack/fear of dialogue and (ii) to replace it other audio/s and (iii) to justify it, call it 'an experimental film' or simply make it weird.

Frankly, I am unconvinced. Having said that I did like that late 60s/70s feel to the intro. Quite hypnotising music, very deep, deeep, deeeeeep :blink:
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#4 Michael McIntyre

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Posted 03 August 2006 - 04:03 PM

Still watching - 1st red flag though. I point this out only because I made a similar mistake while still in school. Very nitpicky but something to use for later on maybe.

Try using "A Film By" or "Created by" Andrew Thorley. I don't know that you're winning over any fans by trying to impress them with the fact that you wrote, shot, directed and cut it. This is not meant to dismiss your skillset but rather to avoid the laundry list approach.

Should someone find fault with one attribute of your film, they can still be somehwat interested and forgiving. Right off the bat, you've armed them with the knowledge that you did EVERYTHING. The viewer now has one and only one person to blame if the smallest detail takes them out of the story for even an instant.

"If he shot it, why didn't he edit around that camera booble?"
"Well, he cut it too, so maybe he didn't shoot anything better."
"That line was weird. Was it because he wrote it that way or directed the actor poorly?!!??"

I realize you worked hard and it feels good seeing it up there, knowing you can do all those things but have the confidence to go with 'less is more'. They can either be surprised to learn, later on, that you did everything or sufficiently underwhelmed that you 'almost' did everything. I guess I should probably watch the rest to know more. Best wishes.....
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#5 Michael McIntyre

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Posted 03 August 2006 - 04:16 PM

Having said that, maybe you do want to take blame for this one. As LondonFilmMan mentioned, don't be afraid of dialogue. The 'experimental' angle has limited staying power with an audience. Maybe a few "Well, that was weird" comments but we don't know anything about the girl or her situation.

I'm guessing abortion-related but you can take it further. You've got the camera placed well and can cut, now take it to another level.
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#6 Jamie Metzger

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Posted 03 August 2006 - 10:02 PM

Sorry Friend, but it's boring, and I can't sit through something that I don't expect to impress me very soon.
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#7 Andrew Thorley

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Posted 13 August 2006 - 10:25 AM

well hello there ladies and gentleman,

I'd firstly like to apologise for subjecting you "the viewer" to that rather poor excuse of a film "Fanny". To be perfectly honest i don't know why i uploaded it onto the internet, I guess I should have used it as a personal reference point or at least a guide on not how to "do things". But then again I do like my works being criticized =D

As for labelling the genre to experimental, well i put my hands up but when i get thinking about it I don't think there's a genre called "shtty crap films" or is there =P.

Thanks for taking the time to view the film, and i really do mean that and hopefully my next offering won't be as dire as this one.


A.Thorley

p.s she did have an abortion
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#8 Patrick McGowan

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Posted 13 August 2006 - 11:43 AM

Don't worry about it. I began a short script that delt with abortion and most people told me not to do it. I ended up not finishing that because it just wasn't working. It is too tough for an inexperienced writer and I think can only be handled in wierd "experimental" movies or lifetime movies. Has anyone even seen a movie (other than Vera Drake) that delt with this subject well?

My advice on short films: pick a concise little story, but film it in a different way or bring your own look to it. That's not the most original way, but it will allow your film to have originality without falling off the deep end. Other point of advice: be your own critic, if something seems like it sucks, don't just immediately try to justify it.

I liked the opening shot though.
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Wooden Camera

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Broadcast Solutions Inc

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Rig Wheels Passport

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