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Continuum - a short film!


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#1 Rajavel Olhiveeran

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Posted 13 February 2007 - 06:00 AM

hi all
i cant resist posting this in this forum......and not just in the 'critique my work'.
please creators.....need ur feedback on the latest short film i did......comment on my cinematography....rip it apart wherever required so that u give me an opportunity to evolve ...to do better cinematography!
my director suraj has uploaded this at
http://www.ifilm.com/video/2821271
we have just sent it to some international film festivals......its great to Participate.
its as good a feeling as participating in this forum of global film makers......that one thing that connects everyone here!
feedback please!....thanks. cheers!
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#2 Mark Williams

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Posted 13 February 2007 - 10:12 AM

hi all
i cant resist posting this in this forum......and not just in the 'critique my work'.
please creators.....need ur feedback on the latest short film i did......comment on my cinematography....rip it apart wherever required so that u give me an opportunity to evolve ...to do better cinematography!
my director suraj has uploaded this at
http://www.ifilm.com/video/2821271
we have just sent it to some international film festivals......its great to Participate.
its as good a feeling as participating in this forum of global film makers......that one thing that connects everyone here!
feedback please!....thanks. cheers!

00.38 LS of boy and girl at the river CU of boy pushing boat cut back to same camera angle and distance. Its best to change the angle and image size otherwise it looks as if we went back to where we came and editing must be disceet. 01.19 Establishing shot and then actors talking would be good to have the camera cut to POV or OTS Views etc

I could go on like this but perhaps I may not understand the style of film making within the culture its set..

As for Cinematography my feeling is its reasoned out but not much thought to colour and set decoration Perhaps think about time of day and decorate sets etc. There was some good clips and some too overblown for my taste BUT still I didnt understand the emotion mostly so I can't be sure of the intended effect. It seemed like some odd camera angles etc to give added mystery to the story served to isolate the characters instead when we should have been involved with them.

Overall I think you have done a good job on limited resources but its not really to my taste.

I felt distanced from the characters and didn't understand the story. I didnt really at any time feel drawn in by the story and didn't feel like I wanted to know the end simply because I didnt know what I was waiting for?

I hope it doesn't feel like a bad review as Its possibly good within its target audience.
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#3 Rajavel Olhiveeran

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Posted 13 February 2007 - 11:27 AM

Thanks Mark for ur genuine feedback. great. i perfectly undestand ur views.

"00.38 LS of boy and girl at the river CU of boy pushing boat cut back to same camera angle and distance. Its best to change the angle and image size otherwise it looks as if we went back to where we came and editing must be disceet."

Yes....i too believe in waht u said. infact when i had taken that shot....i kept in mind the ...the pan from the boat to paper boat...stay on the close up of hand ...and cut to the wide of the two kids playing...and then they move out of the shot....this was in my mind....i dont know Y the editor had to bring the CU of the hand again inside the pattern......


[iI could go on like this but perhaps I may not understand the style of film making within the culture its set.. [/i]

Mark...i think u should go on like this more ..so that i can evolve as i had told u earlier.....i will get a different angle to the plot of creating images.....please go on if u have time....

Thanks once again! it matters!
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#4 Robert G Andrews

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Posted 18 February 2007 - 04:14 PM

GOOD
- The general feeling and story telling.
- Interest value.
- The effort put into this.
- The natural setting was great, nice and colourful.

SO-SO
- I wouldn't cut back to a wide shot after the children sit down with grandma, whereas you have already gone to close-ups.
- As grandma and kids leave the house why are you filming from behind the branches of a bush? By doing that aren't you suggesting that someone is spying on them?
- I might of added a bit more 'small talk'/real dialogue and less narrative. I felt that the dialogue should of been complimented by narrative whereas you had it the other way around.

All said and done, nice job.
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#5 Amit Bhattacharya

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Posted 21 February 2007 - 03:50 PM

very impressive. liked the shots from inside looking out, especially the first time the kids sit down with grandma in a long low angle shot. high angle, a little overused. kudos to all of you for capturing the fairy tale mood. keep it up and good luck.
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#6 Rajavel Olhiveeran

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Posted 22 February 2007 - 03:12 AM

SO-SO
- I wouldn't cut back to a wide shot after the children sit down with grandma, whereas you have already gone to close-ups.
- As grandma and kids leave the house why are you filming from behind the branches of a bush? By doing that aren't you suggesting that someone is spying on them?
- I might of added a bit more 'small talk'/real dialogue and less narrative. I felt that the dialogue should of been complimented by narrative whereas you had it the other way around.

All said and done, nice job.


thanks Mr.Robert for the feedback.
- regrading the shot cutting bak to a wide shot....I agree with u. but editor's taste is gone....wild
- shot from behind the branches of a bush.......ya...that was not their house...they are coming out of a temple after their prayers...and we were not given permission to take camera inside the temple....and i didnt get a clean frame through the entrance way....so hence hanging from the compund wall to take that spying shot.
- narrative style has been planned like that....like a poetry...and story telling.

thanks
cheers!

very impressive. liked the shots from inside looking out, especially the first time the kids sit down with grandma in a long low angle shot. high angle, a little overused. kudos to all of you for capturing the fairy tale mood. keep it up and good luck.


thanks Mr.Amit. great to hear.
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#7 Daniel Smith

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Posted 22 February 2007 - 01:18 PM

I liked it. But I didn't like the zooms, they didn't work for me that well.
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Aerial Filmworks

FJS International, LLC

Opal

Ritter Battery

Gamma Ray Digital Inc

Rig Wheels Passport

Wooden Camera

Abel Cine

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