A short scene from my documentary
Posted 24 June 2007 - 10:55 PM
Obviously the quality of the image is somewhat decresed!
Any feedback is much appreciated
Posted 26 June 2007 - 08:32 PM
First off, this forum requires your display name to be a full first and last name. We like to kow each other.
About the scene, my biggest beef is that I don't give a rats ass if someone catches a train or not. It's a boring subject. The camerawork is fairly standard doc fare except that your handheld operating is extra wobbly and there is a lot of running time that is just following the guy around. The scene could be much, MUCH shorter and still get the point across. If this is a scene from a longer doc, this really should be a 15 or 20 second bridge rather than a six and a half minute epic. I will say it's not half bad if it's your first foray into filmmaking, though.
Posted 27 June 2007 - 12:23 AM
I also disagree that it should be shorter, but then again I like just looking at things. The main character is underexposed much of the time so your eye is drawn to the surroundings, and in that regard the visuals and settings are varied enough that I didn't get bored.
Posted 27 June 2007 - 10:00 PM
I have to care about some aspect of a plot or I won't put any stock in what happens and probably won't even finish the movie. If we knew where he was going and that he MUST get there on time and we knew the weight of the action, then I would like it much more.
Posted 28 June 2007 - 02:04 AM
(That might make sense, or it might not. It makes sense to me anyway...)
Edited by David Sweetman, 28 June 2007 - 02:07 AM.
Posted 28 June 2007 - 01:16 PM
Secondly, as far as catching the next train is concerned, I believe the character mentions it right at the outset that if we miss it, we might need to ask the person for a favor (and that we might not get the car at all.)
And why do we need the car? We need the car because we are doing a cross country road trip from NY to California, we are under 25 thus renting a car is a VERY EXPENSIVE OPTION, and this car we got for free.
I'm sorry I didnt mention these pointers before. Its my first attempt to make a film and on the forum. I'll take better care next time.
Thirdly, the point of posting the piece here was to get some feedback on the editing, sound and camerawork of the piece. I got some pointers already, and thanks a lot for them Any feedback means a lot!!!!
Edited by ssdd, 28 June 2007 - 01:20 PM.
Posted 29 June 2007 - 02:36 AM
Edited by David Sweetman, 29 June 2007 - 02:36 AM.
Posted 29 June 2007 - 04:03 PM
But my biggest dis-like would probably be similar to Chris's. 6 and a half minutes of watching someone run through an underground station worrying that he won't make the train on time?
I think it needs to cut to the chase a little more. Shorten it down a bit.